Love This Girl

As I get this site rolling, the question, “why bother starting a new blog?” enters my mind. There are a million blogs out there. Most of them have no focus. The ones that do seem to exhaust the same topics - politics, technology, etc.

What will be different about this blog?

1. This is not a dating blog. I won’t talk about how to juggle 5 different women, or what to do on that first date. There is a ton of junk on that topic. In fact, all relationship advice for men revolves around dating. Which leads me to my next reason.
2. There is no advice for guys in relationships. What do you do once you find her? Its as if once you are committed, you’ve figured it out and everyone stops helping you do it better! Now is when you really need to turn it up and learn to do it right.
3. Most relationship advice is for women. Do you read Dr. Phil or Oprah? I sure as hell don’t (and would get laughed at by friends). I need an outlet for guys. I’m wired different. I want an approach that tackles relationships with “cojones” (or at least some chutzpah).
4. I have feelings (I just won’t share them with you). Guys are infamous for this. The only person I really tell how I feel is her. What if you have a disagreement with her? You can’t always go to her if she is the subject of that issue. This is an outlet.

Am I wrong on any of these? Are there a lot of sites that I’m missing? Do these topics interest you?

You read that title right. I couldn’t believe it myself. Its on the internet, and some scientists verified it, men that help with housework get more sex. This makes sense: its about shouldering the family burden. How would you feel if your girl was lazy? I’d get pretty tired of washing her clothes, picking up after her and doing all the housework. We got committed for companionship, not to have a child to look after.

The sexual incentive, according to the study, is not huge–just one more night of whoopie per month. But I would imagine the quality of intimacy in general is much higher. Every sexual encounter correlates to a healthy supply of physical contact. So think of it as 5 more hugs, 10 more kisses, and, well, I’ll stop there before my imagination gets the best of me.

So how much housework should you do? There is a trick. Its all a matter of perception. Don’t let your girl know you read this quote:

According to Chethik’s study, a man doesn’t have to do exactly 50 percent of the housework to please his wife. If he just does enough so that she feels supported, she’ll be happier.

Yes! Now all you have to do is be able to read her well (good luck with that).

But seriously, I love my girl. I want her to be happy. More sex is good, but I need her to be in the clouds everyday with me. I’ve found doing chores together can be fulfilling. Washing the dishes is mindless, so conversation can flourish.

With anything, it will all come down to compromise. Give a little, and remember your college dorm is not a comfortable place for girls.

Have you ever given a woman directions? Avoid compass talk, like, “turn north on Main st”. Women don’t work that way. For the longest time I thought it was just the women I was talking to. I never thought to find a reason, just figured they couldn’t handle directions.

Now I know why. We are basically wired differently. Guys have the spatial thing worked out. We like maps, and always having a sense of direction in a place. Women find places based on landmarks. “Turn left at the gas station, then right at the church.”

Throw a man and a woman into a virtual reality maze, which will get out first? The guy. This Time’s article, “In a Virtual Maze, Men Are Smart Rats“, mentions a study that highlights this small but significant difference between men and women. Why significant you ask? If we are so different in this simple aspect, what about stuff that really matters? How many times have I dismissed/angered/upset the women in my life because I thought they were like me?

So why does this difference exist? If it is learned, can it be unlearned? Can men be made to think like women and vice-versa? This study about gay men hints that it goes back to the womb. Apparently gay men use male and female spatial techniques.

Its an interesting topic, but I just need advice. When getting directions for my girl, I guess I’ll just use the Google Maps Satelite option. Then I can say, “Turn right at that little grey spec that looks like a church.”